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Everyone knows that currying favor is harder than it looks. Getting someone on your
side—whether it’s during a presentation or pitch, or simply trying to wow during a social
interaction—is a nerve21
process. Do they like me? Do they agree with what I think?
Am I even making sense?
But
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the secret to connecting with someone may actually be easier than it
seems: simply copy them. We already know mimicking body language, expressions, and
gestures can help people
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relationships, but results from a new
organizational-behavior study indicate that imitating someone’s communication style can also
make you more persuasive. The
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technique is called “linguistic mirroring,” and
data shows that implementing the strategy can boost the efficacy of your message.
Developing this
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-like skill could prove to be a very useful addition to your toolbox
for winning people over – and getting ahead.
To
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linguistic mirrorings, the new study suggests people pay attention to how
others ask their questions and observe what pieces of presentations they find more or less
compelling. This would be “a window of not just how to communicate with them, but also
how they process information.” In writing,
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how your colleagues compose emails,
memos, or on chat, and echo the form and sentiment. People can find lots of hints in the way
they like to communicate. For example, a career consultant says, “I have some colleagues
who love long emails with lots of bullet points and spreadsheets attached. The way to respond
to them is probably to write an equally long email by
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their bullet points one by
one.” In other situations, you might know someone who adds color with personal anecdotes
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and feelings. You could shoot off a similar response—perhaps including a short story of your
own to
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home your point. Or, if you’re talking to someone who’s more buttoned-up
and direct, maybe a superior or an executive, go straight for the answer. Leave the humor at
the door, if that’s what they do. In short, if you present something to me in a way that I’m
used to hearing, how I
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my thoughts—it’s easier for me to process the essence of
that argument, so as a result, it allows you to be more persuasive.
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